The Real Life of a Pastor's Wife

Things are changing around here.... well changing and staying the same in an interesting dynamic! I am no longer a youth pastor's wife, but I am still at the same time! We have recently resigned from FBC Troup, which was the place we have been serving longer than any other place before it. We have accepted the call to be church plant pastors and with that church plant youth pastors at the same time, at least until the baby church grows into needing additional staff. So I am now a pastor/youth pastor's wife; translation I am still just a normal, girl who happens to be married to some one in the ministry. I am blogging to make sure everyone knows that my family and I are not perfect,to share with everyone what God is doing in me and to give you a peek into the craziness that is my real life. It is my prayer that no matter how you found this blog, and no matter who you are, God will use these words to speak to your heart and draw you closer to Himself. I would love to hear from you; comments, questions, complaints, and randomness is always welcome!!

The family!

The family!

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Monday, April 2, 2018

Miracles from trash


I’m a gardener. An amateur gardener. A lazy amateur gardener with very few tools, space or experience. But last year we got loads of cucumbers, peppers, onions and tomatoes. Nothing else produced much but it was fun to have a reason to dig in the dirt none the less.  I already have some good looking potatoes coming up, tiny spinach and carrots, onions that are looking kinda sad, a couple ok looking cucumber and spaghetti squash plants as well as quite a few tomato plants. I was pretty proud of what I had grown. Until Cheney found the actual beanstalk that Jack climbed so long ago, growing in a surprising place. It is huge and puts all my tiny weak little plants to shame. I’ve watered my plants and lazily weeded around them a little. I’ve tried to keep the ants out. I even planted them with the spacing recommended on the seed packet during the right week of the year. They have pretty great growing conditions and they will eventually probably produce some veggies I can force my family to eat. BUT that “beanstalk” oh my goodness. It’s stalk is so thick, it’s leaves are so green, it’s huge and beautiful. And it’s growing in trash. For the last two year we have been putting our fruit, vegetable and other vegan kitchen scraps a blue rubber made tub that I drilled holes in. I got lazy and tired of carrying everything out there daily so it’s been sitting in the backyard forgotten for months. The lid blew away at some point and no one has been mixing it or checking the moisture like a good composted would do. Yet somehow that is where this huge plant is growing. It’s a seed from one of the many things we chunked in there and judging from the leaves it’s probably in the squash/melon family. It looks like a redwood tree compared to my little plants. It is also surrounded by orange peals, egg shells and some plant parts I honestly can’t tell what are. It’s a trash heap. This got me thinking, maybe our lives are like plants. There are times when conditions are great and everything is smooth sailing and it seems we have all we need. There are also times we nothing goes right and we are surrounded by tragedy, difficulties, disappointments and uncertainty. Will we have what we need? Can we survive what’s happening? It seems counterintuitive but from my experience we rarely make great emiphanies or growth toward maturity in the easy breezy times. On the contrary,  the greatest growth often comes during the most trying times. When work is exhausting and you can’t seem to catch a break and it’s pouring on you. When your marriage seems hopeless and beyond hope. When the doctor doesn’t say what you were praying he would. When death comes much earlier than anyone expected. When you’re dreams are crushed and it seems nothing good will ever be realized. When you’re in the trash heap, God shows up and does what only he can do, he makes beautiful things out of the worst situations. When things are easy and we are well provides for, we get comfy and content and lazy so there isn’t much motivation or perceived need for growth or change. But when we are covered in crap we are more than willing to call out to God and ask for help, and help He does! He fills us up and heals our hearts and helps us see or understand, he comforts us and all along the way he’s changing us to be bigger and stronger and more like him. Occasionally he scoops us right up out of the mess and gives us a better place, but most of the time we have to stay right where we are, in the trash heap, and he uses that to bring about his will in and through us. So if things are less than great and you’re not sure if anything will ever be right again please talk to the gardener who can use right where you are to grow you into a giant in the faith. Another thing about my trash heap plant is it’s a mystery. I can guess what it is but I can’t be certain just yet. Eventually it’s going to tell me what it is by the fruit it grows. God’s work in us can be very much like that. It’s hard to see and understand what he’s doing, especially when there’s trash all around and things are so hard. We can’t see the big picture and we don’t know the outcome, but God knows what he’s growing and in time He will show us and we will be able to enjoy the fruit of it. Maybe He’s growing patience, or perseverance or forgiveness or character or priorities or hope. Maybe He’s growing strength or humility or compassion or clarity. No matter what he’s growing we can be sure that it’s going to  be something good if we can hang on. I know there are so many people sitting in the trash heap surrounded by broken things and left over pieces of dreams and faith, and that’s a hard, hard place to be, but take heart, God can use that to grow the biggest most beautiful version of you for his glory and your good. Trust him and listen to him and let him have his way and you’ll be so glad you did. I’ll keep you posted on my mystery compost plant! We can find out what God’s up
 to together!